Many people have been asking what our attachment plan is for when Jacob comes home. I feel so fortunate that we have been able to stay in Ethiopia with him, that I’m thinking we won’t have to worry too much about others holding him once we are home. He seems to be pretty well attached to us. I know that once we get home to a new place and new people Jacob will go through another adjustment period, but he seems to be pretty well bonded with Brad and I so I’m hoping it will be a short adjustment period. The two main things that we will stick to is only Brad or I feeding Jacob, changing his diapers, and putting him to sleep. Jacob seems to have a few issues with sleeping. For the first two weeks that Jacob was with us, he would wake up many times a night scared and checking to see if we are still there. He now sleeps with one hand on each of us. One day we went back to the Transition House and his nannies were holding him, he kept his eye on me and gave me a look that said “don’t you dare leave me here”. That night he had a night terror. That was scary. We couldn’t get him to wake up or stop crying. But since then he hasn’t been back to see the nannies. As far as other people holding him, we will just see how he responds and go from there. We will see how Jacob responds to people holding him at first. One thing we are going to do is that Brad or I will be holding him in between each person that holds him. He will come back to one of us each time just so he will feel comfortable. We won’t be taking him to the church nursery for a while either. It’s too much like the orphanage setting that he was in for the first part of his life.
We will probably try to stay home for the first week to help him get adjusted to his new house and surroundings. And to help all of us adjust back to IL time. We want to invite anyone who wants to come meet Jacob to come to the Peoria Airport! We will let you know when our plane will be landing in Peoria. We want everyone to be able to give him hugs and kisses and we will see how he is responding to being held with so many new faces around. I’m hoping he will be somewhat awake because it will be the middle of the night Ethiopia time.
We just want to do what is best for Jacob, thank you for supporting us with this!
You are such great parents for Jacob. I know God kept you in Ethiopia just the right amount of time for all of you to bond as a precious family!! We are so proud of you for all you've done to bring Jacob into all of our lives.
ReplyDeleteSo when do you get to come home? It sounds you have thought things out well. Just remember that children and their emotions are very unpredictable. Just be prepared and flexible and you'll be fine!!! BJ had a ton of night terrors about 2 or 3 a night for the first 6 months. By the time he'd been home a year they were almost completely gone. Maybe 1 a week at most then 1 a month, etc. The best thing to do is NOT to wake them up. Believe it or not, in studies of older children that expereinced this, when they awoke the next morning, they had no memory of the terrible ordeal. They are literaly experiencing it in their sleep! Waking them up is so much more traumatic for them because they don't understand what's going on! The best thing to do is either hold them and soothe them until they stop or put your hand on their back or forehead and rub them gently until they stop and are in a more restful sleep. I paniced the first few times BJ had one, but when I read up on it, I felt a lot better. Plus the tips really worked! Here's to a quick eventless flight home!
ReplyDelete